It is common for romantic partners to doubt a lifetime commitment. However, how does it feel when one half of a couple is ready to settle down while the other half remains apprehensive about living together? Well, Netflix’s ‘The Ultimatum: Queer Love‘ attempts to explore just that by bringing together five couples who suffer from the same predicament. While the partner ready for marriage issues an ultimatum for their better half, these pairs are also allowed to inter-mingle and have one last trial relationship before the most important decision of their lives.
While Yoly Rojas came on to the show after issuing an ultimatum to her girlfriend, Mal, Xander Boger was dating his partner, Vanessa, for over four years before asking her to make a decision between marriage or separation. However, shortly after getting to meet each other, Xander and Yoly developed an intimate bond rivaled by very few. Well, with the cameras now turned away, let’s find out if the two are still together, shall we?
Xander and Yoly’s The Ultimatum Queer Love Journey
Interestingly Xander met her girlfriend, Vanessa, in high school as their boyfriends were best friends. However, when they reconnected years later, the pair discovered a mutual attraction, and it did not take long for them to begin dating. At the time of filming, Xander and Vanessa had been together for four years and even built a wonderful life in Hawaii. Yet, when Xander asked her girlfriend if she was ready to take the next step, Vanessa voiced her apprehension and claimed that marriage could take away the freedom she loved so dearly. Hence, Xander had no choice but to issue an ultimatum in the hopes of a solution.
On the other hand, Yoly met Mal during a Chicago Pride Walk, and even though they initially agreed to be friends, it was impossible to resist the growing attraction. While the two have been dating for quite a long time, the show revealed how they survived a move to Seattle and even experienced a temporary breakup. However, once Yoly began discussing marriage, Mal began worrying and claimed they were not financially stable to make such a decision. Hence, Yoly eventually issued her partner an ultimatum and brought her to the show.
Interestingly, once the couples got to mingle with each other, Yoly felt herself gravitating toward Xander, and they both appeared to understand each other pretty well. Xander was overjoyed to find someone who did not fear commitment, and Yoly loved how her trial partner valued her decisions and never took her for granted. On top of it, it was refreshing to witness Xander and Yoly’s growing relationship as they learned to trust each other and tried to talk out their issues before engaging in pointless altercations. Besides, Xander also felt quite lucky to have someone as organized and level-headed as Yoly as her trial partner, as she found Vanessa’s behavior to be quite erratic at times.
Quite unsurprisingly, Xander and Vanessa’s connection deteriorated when the latter began establishing a flirtatious relationship with Lexi and her girlfriend, Raelyn. Moreover, although Vanessa decided to couple up with Raelyn for the experiment, she was visibly infuriated when Xander chose Yoly for the same. The show even documented Vanessa verbally abusing her partner of four years while Yoly decided to stand up for Xander in front of everyone else. Furthermore, there is also the factor of Xander and Yoly’s intimacy, which came quite naturally to the couple, unlike Vanessa, who slept with Rae just for the sake of it.
Xander Bogar and Yoly Rojas Are Not Together Anymore
While on the show, Xander and Yoly developed an incredible connection, and it was refreshing to witness them enjoy each other’s company without any ulterior motive. Moreover, one cannot ignore the intimacy they appeared to share, and it was evident that Yoly and Xander developed genuine feelings during the three-week experiment. However, despite the turmoil in her heart, Yoly continued missing her girlfriend, Mal, and she could not help but reminisce about the memories they had made together.
Well, even though neither Xander nor Yoly revealed much about their relationship on social media, it seems like the latter returned to Mal after the three-week experiment. While we are happy to report that Yoly and Mal follow each other on social media, the former even posted a video from Netflix’s “All Out” pre-pride party, where she was spotted partying with Mal and a few of their castmates. Meanwhile, a few of Mal’s recent social media posts feature him with a ring on, while Xander appears to lead an active and independent lifestyle. Hence, considering current developments, we believe that Xander and Yoly aren’t together, although they remained on friendly terms.
Read More: Are Vanessa and Rae From The Ultimatum: Queer Love Still Together?