In October 2011, 37-year-old mother of two Marie Carlson suddenly disappeared. Her family reported her missing within days because they knew she wouldn’t abandon her kids. What followed was an extensive investigation that unraveled a web of complex relationships, lies, and rumors within a Florida church community, until the assailant was finally brought to justice. NBC’s ‘Dateline: Secrets on the Emerald Coast’ chronicles the case in detail, along with how the perpetrator’s wife, Tanya Flanders, was reportedly unaware of anything related to the matter.
Tanya Flanders Initially Gave Conflicting Accounts Regarding Her Relationship With Marie Carlson
Fort Walton Beach, Florida, residents Tanya Flanders and her pastor husband, Jams Flanders, first met Marie Carlson in 2009 when she stepped into his church. According to records, the latter was struggling with some personal issues at the time, so the couple decided to take her under their wing and moved her into their home in October of the same year. Marie fell pregnant in late 2010, following which it was initially claimed that the baby’s father was her recent abusive ex-boyfriend; however, authorities later determined he didn’t even exist.

Things changed a short while later, as Tanya reportedly told her closest friends that Marie had agreed to be a surrogate for the couple upon learning they had always wanted a big family. The Flanders did have a daughter, as per the show, but their subsequent attempts to expand their family were unsuccessful as the pastor’s wife suffered several miscarriages. Thus, they welcomed Grace Flanders as one of their own around the summer of 2011; she was 3 months old when her biological mother suddenly disappeared without a trace left behind.
When investigators initially questioned Tanya and James about Marie, they claimed Tanya was out shopping with Grace when the 37-year-old allegedly left their home on her own free will. They added that the pastor had stayed home on the fateful day of October 18, as he was worried about Marie’s mental health. However, they then alleged, he did step out for a few minutes to go on a run, during which she got in her own car and escaped. Tanya later reiterated the surrogacy claim to officials, but the truth, as it eventually came to light, was that they were a throuple. Authorities and subsequent reports concluded Tanya, James, and Marie had engaged in a polyamous relationship, with the two women essentially acting as “sister wives.”
Still Raising Grace, Tanya Prefers to Remain Away From the Limelight Today
Since Tanya had ended up indicating that Marie was a surrogate for the Flanders, some rumors regarding the couple’s parenting rights started swirling around when the biological mother went missing. One such rumor was that they had long convinced her to hand over Grace to them and then leave town for good as soon as the baby turned 3 months old. Another indicated they had plans to move forward with a formal adoption, which Tanya seemingly backed by telling detectives that whenever she or her husband brought up adoption, Marie would become withdrawn. However, in the months to follow, the truth about the trio’s real connection came to light, and suspicion fell on James.

That’s when the Flanders, with Grace in tow, relocated from Florida to Arizona without any warnings. Then, in 2013, with Marie still considered missing, they filed for her parental rights to be terminated so as to become her then-2-year-old daughter’s legal guardians. Less than 2 years later, in May 2015, James was charged with second-degree murder in connection with the 37-year-old’s demise, even though her remains still hadn’t been recovered. Things changed in April 2016 as he agreed to plead guilty to the lesser charge of manslaughter in exchange for revealing her location and what precisely transpired between them.
According to James’ confession, Tanya and Grace were indeed out shopping when he and Marie got into an intense argument that culminated in her accidental death. He alleged he did not intend to harm her in any way, shape, or form, which is why he panicked and ended up burying her in the backyard of the home they all shared. The former pastor was clear in claiming that his wife had no hand in the matter, and while she was never charged with any crime, officials did scrutinize her knowledge of the events and wonder if she knew more than she ever let on. Since then, Tanya’s sole focus has seemingly been on Grace, whose custody she retained after engaging in a contentious legal battle with Marie’s family. So, today, she prefers to lead a quiet life well away from the spotlight in Cochise, Arizona, where she is surrounded by Grace, who is almost 15 today.
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